6 reasons men say no to sex

Why does he turn down sex?

When it comes to sex, men are ready to go at any time, right? Well, not always, says 29-year-old P.J., an online producer “It’s rare that I don’t want to have sex, but the times I will say no are when I’m thinking about something intensely and I can’t pull myself out of it,” he explains.

Not even a surprise birthday visit from his girlfriend wearing lingerie could pique his interest one time when he was deep in thought. “I was feeling pensive and I didn’t want to be outside of myself. And with sex, you want to connect with somebody,” he says.

It may be difficult to imagine that a healthy heterosexual man would turn down a woman wearing a thong. However, P.J. is far from alone in this situation, says sex therapist David McKenzie. “In the last two years, I’ve noticed more clients of mine than before are men lacking sexual desire and it’s the women who are initiating sex,” he says.


If your partner is turning down your advances there’s probably a good explanation for his lack of interest—and it likely has nothing to do with how he feels about you. Here are some common reasons why men say no, and what you can do to get him back to saying, “Yes!”

Here are six reasons your partner might be saying no to sex, and what you can do about them.


1. He’s suffering from depression

“Clinical depression is one of the biggest killers of sex drive in men,” says McKenzie. Men of all ages, even teenagers, may experience much lower sex drive when they’re struggling with this mood disorder.

What you can do: “Remember that clinical depression is a physical illness and not a character weakness,” says McKenzie. There are plenty of online resources available to help you and your partner better understand depression and how it can affect your relationship. The key here is patience, especially during treatment—while antidepressants are very effective in treating depression, they can also contribute to low sexual interest. Your partner may want to speak to a doctor, however, if he notices that treatment is severely interfering with his sex drive.

2. His testosterone levels are low

“When a man gets to be over 40, his testosterone levels begin to decrease,” says McKenzie. “If this happens mildly over time, then a man will gradually lose his sexual prowess. But sometimes males can lose testosterone very rapidly.” This condition is sometimes referred to as andropause and comes with symptoms that include loss of energy, depressive symptoms and low sex drive.

What you can do: Low testosterone is a physical condition that can be treated by a physician. If you suspect your partner is experiencing some of the symptoms associated with andropause, suggest he ask his doctor for a testosterone test to determine if low levels are to blame for his lack of desire.

3. He's got trouble with the plumbing

Though erectile dysfunction and premature ejaculation are common problems, says McKenzie, a man who experiences these difficulties may withdraw from his partner for fear that she’ll be disappointed or think that he’s less of a man.

“It’s hard on a man’s self esteem to not be able to perform in bed,” explains David, a 28-year-old musician. “Growing up, guys always talk about being a player and being able to perform well sexually. It’s part of guy culture.”

What you can do: This can be a difficult subject to discuss with your partner, but don’t avoid the issue, says McKenzie. A problem left untreated could result in resentment between partners down the road. Approach the situation very delicately, David advises. “Start by saying, ‘You know I love you no matter what,’” he suggests. “Don’t make a big deal out of it or make him feel like it will affect your interest in him as a partner if he can’t make it happen.”

4. He’s stressed out about his career

Worrying about work can be a real mood killer for many men, especially if they tend to equate professional success with self-worth. “It’s the times when I feel like I’m going nowhere and accomplishing nothing in my career that I will spiral into a negative place and I would say no to sex,” David explains.

What you can do: Discuss the situation away from the bedroom. “Right before bed isn’t always the best time to engage in a deep conversation,” says David. Instead, mutually decide on a good time to chat about what’s going on in his life. Ask if there’s anything you can do to support him through a stressful time, but be clear that his demanding job is taking a toll on your relationship.

5. He’s exhausted

Chances are, if your partner says he’s too tired for some late-night nookie, he’s really exhausted. “If I’m a little tired, I’m usually up for it,” says David. “But there are times when I’m just so dead to the world I’m physically incapable [of having sex].”

What you can do: Don’t take it personally. According to McKenzie, about 98 percent of the men he counsels would say that their lack of sexual interest has nothing to do with how they feel about their partners. P.J. concurs. “It would be a turn-off if my partner were to make the issue about her, because then I would feel guilty on top of being exhausted,” he says. Rather than acting hurt or angry, set the stage for a conversation about what’s going on in his life to make him so tired. But if the problem persists for more than six weeks, it’s time to consider getting help from a therapist or physician.

6. You’re moving too fast

If a new man you’re dating turns down an invitation to “come upstairs for a nightcap,” he could be trying to tell you that he’s not ready to sleep with you yet. “There’s a lot of emotional involvement that comes with having sex with somebody,” says P.J. “How do you get skin to skin with someone you don’t know?”

What you can do: Slow down—this could be a sign that the guy wants to get to know you better before getting physical. Take the declined invitation in stride and remember that, despite what your father might have told you before the prom, guys do have more than one thing on their minds. “We’re emotional beings too, and we want more than just sex,” says P.J.

Natural Ways to Improve Male Libido

You can achieve a high libido naturally by following the following guidelines.

1. Eat nutritious and energetic foods like celery, raw oysters, eggs, liver, bananas, avocado, nuts, mangoes, peaches, strawberries, figs, garlic, and chocolate. Take a healthy diet rich in proteins and limited in carbohydrates and moderate in essential fats. Carbohydrates specially those that consist of simple sugars such as potatoes increase insulin and cortisol levels in your blood which affects testosterone production negatively.

2. Exercise regularly to maintain your weight. Obesity is a risk factor for erectile dysfunction and low testosterone. By eating well and exercising you can in increase testosterone product and thus an increase in libido. The ideal period to workout is 45-60 minutes in a single routine. Any more than that and your body start producing cortisol, which inhibits and diminishes testosterone production in your body.

3. Avoid saturated fat as it can lead to clogging of the arteries which in turn can impede blood flow to the genital region. This not only interferes with your ability to perform, but also with sexual pleasure.

4. Try to live a stress free life. If you feel good and self confident you may feel more sexual and attractive to your partner. A relaxed state of mind is very important for elevating your libido.

5. Proper sleep is also important in keeping you strong and energetic in bed. So maintain a consistent sleep schedule. A good sleep helps you raise your sex drive substantially.

6. Say no to alcohol and cigarette. They actually reduce the production of testosterone in men. Drunken sex might be fun while you are young but it just doesn't work as you get older.

One of the most important secrets in learning how to increase libido lies in understanding common root causes for a low sex drive. To get complete information on how to improve male libido, be sure to grab the ebook - Anytime...for As Long As You Want. Heat up your sex life!

Feel-good Sayings

* I’ve learned that the best classroom in the world is at the feet of an elderly person.

* I’ve learned that when you’re in love, it shows.

* I’ve learned that just one person saying to me, "You’ve made my day!" makes my day.

* I’ve learned that having a child fall asleep in your arms is one of the most peaceful feelings in the world.

* I’ve learned that being kind is more important than being right.

* I’ve learned that you should never say no to a gift from a child.

* I’ve learned that I can always pray for someone when I don’t have the strength to help him in some other way.

* I’ve learned that no matter how serious your life requires you to be, everyone needs a friend to act goofy with.

* I’ve learned that sometimes all a person needs is a hand to hold and a heart to understand.

* I’ve learned that simple talks with my parents when I was a child did wonders for me as an adult.

* I’ve learned that life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

* I’ve learned that we should be glad God doesn’t give us every thing we ask for.

* I’ve learned that money doesn’t buy class.

* I’ve learned that it’s those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

* I’ve learned that under everyone’s hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

* I’ve learned that the Lord didn’t do it all in one day. What makes me think I can?

* I’ve learned that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

* I’ve learned that when you plan to get even with someone, you are only letting that person continue to hurt you.

* I’ve learned that love, not time, heals all wounds.

* I’ve learned that the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to surround myself with people smarter than I am.

* I’ve learned that everyone you meet deserves to be greeted with a smile.

* I’ve learned that there’s nothing sweeter than sleeping with your babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.

* I’ve learned that no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

* I’ve learned that life is tough, but I’m tougher.

* I’ve learned that opportunities are never lost; someone will take the ones you miss.

* I’ve learned that when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock elsewhere.

* I’ve learned that I wish I could have told my Mom & Dad that I loved them one more time before they passed away.

* I’ve learned that one should keep his words both soft and tender, because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

* I’ve learned that a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your looks.

* I’ve learned that I can’t choose how I feel, but I can choose what I do about it.

* I’ve learned that when your newly born grandchild holds your little finger in his little fist, that you’re hooked for life.

* I’ve learned that everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness comes while you’re climbing it.

* I’ve learned that the less time I have to work with, the more things I get done.

Aphrodisiac

An aphrodisiac is a substance which is used in the belief that it increases sexual desire. The name comes from Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of sensuality. Throughout history, many foods, drinks, and behaviors have had a reputation for making sex more attainable and/or pleasurable. However, from a historical and scientific standpoint, the alleged results may have been mainly due to mere belief by their users that they would be effective (i.e., the placebo effect). In particular, medical science has not substantiated claims that any particular food increases sexual desire or performance.

Throughout the centuries, emperors and everyday folk alike have ingested, imbibed, sprinkled, or applied almost every conceivable substance—from almond paste to zebra tongues—in the hope of arousing sexual desire. Whether to woo a reluctant lover, revive a flagging libido, or pique carnal pleasure and performance, lovers the world over have relied on aphrodisiacs to do the trick. But which ones have the greatest reputations for potency (and why?) and do any of them really work?

Aphrodisiacs Through the Ages

The association between food and eroticism is primal, but some foods have more aphrodisiacal qualities than others. Biblical heroines, ancient Egyptians, and Homeric sorceresses all swore by the root and fruit of the mandrake plant. The grape figured prominently in the sensual rites of Greek Dionysian cults, and well-trained geishas have been known to peel plump grapes for their pampered customers. Fermented, of course, grape juice yields wine, renowned for loosening inhibitions and enhancing attraction (though as Shakespeare's porter wryly notes in Macbeth, alcohol "provokes the desire, but it takes away the performance"). Honey sweetens the nectarlike philters prescribed in the Kama Sutra to promote sexual vigor, and the modern "honeymoon" harks back to the old custom for newlyweds to drink honeyed mead in their first month of marriage. Grains like rice and wheat have long been associated with fertility if not with love, and Avena sativa (green oats), an ingredient in many over-thecounter sexual stimulants, may explain why young people are advised to "sow their wild oats." Numerous herbs and spices—basil, mint, cinnamon, cardamom, fenugreek, ginger, pepper, saffron, and vanilla, to name a few—appear in ancient and medieval recipes for love potions, as well as in lists of foodstuffs forbidden in convents because of their aphrodisiac properties.

Among other delicacies banned by the Church in centuries past were black beans, avocados, and chocolate, presumably all threats to chastity. And truffles—both earthy black and ethereal white—caused religious consternation in the days of the Arab empire. One story has it that the muhtasib of Seville tried to prohibit their sale anywhere near a mosque, for fear they would corrupt the morals of good Muslims. For those who held debauchery in higher esteem, the list of favored aphrodisiacs was bound only by the imagination. The herb valerian, noted for its stimulant properties at lower doses, was long a brothel favorite, and yu-jo, professional women of pleasure in feudal Japan, supplemented their charms with the aphrodisiacal powers of eels, lotus root, and charred newts.

From Symbol to Science

How did certain foods come to be regarded as aphrodisiacs in the first place? In some cases, legendary associations play a likely role: Cleopatra is rumored to have rubbed her private parts with a honey-almond mixture that drove Mark Antony mad. Some believe that the Aztec ruler Montezuma fortified himself with upwards of fifty cups of chocolate before visiting his harem (though more scholarly reports contend it was the conquistadors who sought such reinforcement). Casanova famously boasted of seducing a virgin by slipping a raw oyster into her mouth. Madame du Barry is said to have used ginger in a custardy concoction that stirred Louis XV to passion. And because Aphrodite, Greek goddess of sexual love, was said in myth to be born from the sea, a beguiling array of seafoods have been deemed aphrodisiacs (her very name is the source of the word).

Symbolism, too, plays an obvious part. During the Middle Ages, the Law of Similarities, or Doctrine of Signatures, held that in God's universe "like causes like," so suggestively shaped and textured substances were believed to enhance virility and fertility by virtue of their resemblance to sexual organs. Firm, elongated asparagus, sea cucumbers, and ginseng (literally, "manroot") and moist, fleshy figs, peaches, and oysters are prime examples. Other symbolic aphrodisiacs are rhinoceros horn and deer antler and the sex organs of animals known for their virility or procreative fervor, such as the tiger or rabbit.

Some foods are exalted as aphrodisiacs by virtue of their rarity or luxury. Bird's nest soup, foie gras, caviar, truffles, and champagne are all, even if no longer necessarily difficult to obtain, still suggestive of wealth and largesse, playing into the age-old association among food, sex, and the provision of resources. Certain foods also lend themselves to particularly sensual dining rituals and modes of eating. Preparing food tableside with competence and élan, consuming whole ripe fruits or succulent birds or crustaceans, eating with the hands, licking fingers coated in delectable juices, feeding one's partner, sharing food from a common platter, sucking and slurping seductively—such acts and rituals constitute true foreplay for culinarily inclined lovers.

"No one has ever succeeded at seduction by means of food alone," wrote Manuel Vázquez Montalbán in his Immoral Recipes, "but there's a long list of those who have seduced by talking about that which was about to be eaten." Certainly, stimulating the mind helps stoke the sexual appetite, and it is our social and cultural associations that imbue certain foods with erotic meanings. But is there solid scientific evidence to support the claims made for aphrodisiacs beyond their placebo effect?

Proponents of chocolate point out that it contains phenylethylamine, or PEA, the brain chemical believed to underlie the euphoric sensation of being "in love." But eating chocolate has not been found to actually increase PEA levels in the body. The chili pepper may have a stronger claim to its fiery reputation: it quickens the pulse and induces sweating, mimicking the state of sexual arousal, and has also been shown to stimulate the release of endorphins, naturally occurring opiates that play a role in sexual pleasure. Ginkgo biloba, said to boost both mental and sexual performance, may restore or enhance physical function by increasing blood flow to the genitals, but the safety and efficacy of this herbal enhancer are still unclear (heart patients and those on aspirin need to be especially cautious). Garlic may promote potency through a similar mechanism, with its high content of arginine, an amino acid that enhances blood flow and could thereby augment erections. The lure of the elusive truffle may derive in part from a pheromonelike chemical it contains, similar to one secreted in the saliva of male pigs to attract sows. And the oyster, that consummate aphrodisiac, is noted not only for its fleshy, briny sensuality but also for its rich supply of zinc, which may aid normal sperm production and libido (though it is unlikely that oysters make a difference in any but the most zinc-deficient diets).

The Ultimate Aphrodisiac

Overall, aphrodisiacs seem to be more the stuff of folklore than of science. But in the realm of food and love, the power of the imagination is not to be ignored—believing something's an aphrodisiac may well make it so. Yet all the oysters in the world cannot take the place of the ultimate aphrodisiac. As the Roman philosopher Seneca once promised, "I will show you a philter without potions, without herbs, without any witch's incantation—if you wish to be loved, love."


Fortunately, safer drugs are now available to aid impotence, and people experiencing sexual dysfunction are well advised to seek medical advice.

Some natural items purported to be aphrodisiacs when ingested or applied to the body.

*Ambergris
*Arugula (Rocket)
*Eruca sativa)
*Atta laevigata
*Balut
*Borojo (Borojoa patinoi)
*Chocolate contains theobromine, a stimulating alkaloid, and helps the brain produce feel-good serotonin
*Damiana (Turnera diffusa)
*Epimedium grandiflorum (Horny Goat Weed)
*Eurycoma longifolia
*Ginkgo biloba
*Ginseng
*Kelp
*Lettuce, considered an aphrodisiac in Ancient Egypt. Eaten by the sexually potent *God of Chaos, Seth.
*Maca
*Mucuna pruriens
Onion
*Oysters Raw oysters are very high in zinc which raises sperm and testosterone production
*Pumpkin
*Socratea exorrhiza
*Spanish fly (cantharidin)
*Tribulus terrestris[30][31][32]
*Yohimbine
*Almonds
*Artichokes
*Asparagus In 19th-century France, bridegrooms were served three courses of the *vegetable at their prenuptial dinner.
*Avocado The Aztecs called the avocado tree "Ahuacuatl," or "testicle tree." [33]
*Bananas The sap of the red banana is considered an aphrodisiac in Central America
*Strawberries
*Tomatoes (allegedly to the French term pomme d'amour as a misrendering of pomme de *Maure)[citation needed]
*Truffles
*Eggs
*Mussels
*Mamey sapote[citation needed]
*Oranges
*Clementines
*Tangerines


Related Links:

* Honey

Whooping cough (pertussis)

Whooping cough (pertussis) is an acute, highly contagious respiratory infection that is caused by a bacterium. The first outbreaks of pertussis were described in the 16th century. The bacterium responsible for the infection, Bordetella pertussis, was not isolated until 1906. The incidence of pertussis has been steadily increasing since the 1980s. According to the U.S. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), a total of 25,827 cases of pertussis were reported in 2004 in the U.S.

Can whooping cough be prevented with a vaccine?
Whooping cough commonly affects infants and young children but can be prevented by immunization with pertussis vaccine. Pertussis vaccine is most commonly given in combination with the vaccines for diphtheria and tetanus. (Pertussis is the "P" in the DTaP combination inoculation routinely given to children, and the "p" in the Tdap vaccine administered to adolescents and adults.) Since immunity from the pertussis vaccine wears off with time, many teenagers and adults get whooping cough.

What are the stages, symptoms, and signs of whooping cough?
*The first stage of whooping cough is known as the catarrhal stage. In the catarrhal stage, which typically lasts from one to two weeks, an infected person has symptoms characteristic of an upper respiratory infection, including runny nose, sneezing, low-grade fever, or a mild, occasional cough, similar to the common cold.
The cough gradually becomes more severe, and after one to two weeks, the second stage begins.
*It is during the second stage (the paroxysmal stage) that the diagnosis of whooping cough usually is suspected. The second stage is characterized by:

-Bursts (paroxysms) of coughing, or numerous rapid coughs, are apparently due to difficulty expelling thick mucus from the airways in the lungs. Bursts of coughing increase in frequency during the first one to two weeks, remain constant for two to three weeks, and then gradually begin to decrease in frequency.
-At the end of the bursts of rapid coughs, a long inspiratory effort (breathing in) is usually accompanied by a characteristic high-pitched "whoop."
-During an attack, the individual may become cyanotic (turn blue) from lack of oxygen.
-Children and young infants appear especially ill and distressed.
-Vomiting (referred to by doctors as posttussive vomiting) and exhaustion commonly follow the episodes of coughing.
-The person usually appears normal between episodes.
-Paroxysmal attacks occur more frequently at night, with an average of 15-24 attacks per 24 hours.
-The paroxysmal stage usually lasts from one to six weeks but may persist for up to 10 weeks.
-Infants under 6 months of age may not have the strength to have a whoop, but they do have paroxysms of coughing.
The third stage of whooping cough is the recovery or convalescent stage. In the convalescent stage, recovery is gradual. The cough becomes less paroxysmal and usually disappears over two to three weeks; however, paroxysms often recur with subsequent respiratory infections for many months.

How is whooping cough transmitted?
Whooping cough is highly contagious and is spread among people by direct contact with fluids from the nose or mouth of infected people. People contaminate their hands with respiratory secretions from an infected person and then touch their own mouth or nose. In addition, small bacteria-containing droplets enter the air during coughing or sneezing. People can become infected by breathing in these drops.

Can adults get whooping cough?

Although whooping cough is considered to be an illness of childhood, adults may also develop the disease. The illness usually is milder in adults than in children, but the duration of the paroxysmal cough is just as long as in children. The characteristic whoop that occurs after paroxysmal bouts of coughing is recognized in only 20%-40% of adults with whooping cough. Because immunity from the pertussis vaccine decreases over time but does not necessarily disappear, adults who do become infected may have retained a partial degree of immunity against the infection that results in a milder illness. Whooping cough in adults is more common than usually appreciated, accounting for up to 7% of adult illnesses that cause coughing each year. Infected adults are a reservoir (source) of infection for children.

How is whooping cough diagnosed?

When a patient has the typical symptoms of whooping cough, the diagnosis can be made from the clinical history. However, the disease and its symptoms, including its severity, can vary among affected individuals. In cases where the diagnosis is not certain or a doctor wants to confirm the diagnosis, laboratory tests can be carried out. Culture of the bacterium Bordetella pertussis from nasal secretions can establish the diagnosis. Another test that has been used to successfully identify the bacterium and diagnose pertussis is the polymerase chain reaction (PCR) test that can identify genetic material from the bacterium in nasal secretions,
How is whooping cough treated?

Antibiotics directed against Bordetella pertussis can be effective in reducing the severity of pertussis when administered early in the course of the disease. Antibiotic therapy can also help reduce the risk of transmission of the bacterium to other household members as well as to others who may come into contact with an infected person. Unfortunately, most people with pertussis are diagnosed later with the condition in the second (paroxysmal) stage of the disease. Treatment with antibiotics is recommended for anyone who has had the disease for less than 21 days. Azithromycin (Zithromax), clarithromycin (Biaxin), erythromycin, and trimethoprim/sulfamethoxazole are antibiotics which have been shown to be effective in treating whooping cough. It is unclear whether antibiotics have any benefit for people who have been ill with pertussis for longer periods, although antibiotic therapy is still often considered for this group. There is no proven effective treatment for the paroxysms of coughing that accompany pertussis.
Antibiotics are also routinely administered to people who have had close contact with an infected person, regardless of their vaccination status.

Complications of whooping cough (pertussis)

The most common complication and the cause of most pertussis-related deaths is secondary bacterial pneumonia. (Secondary bacterial pneumonia is bacterial pneumonia that follows another infection of the lung, be it viral or bacterial. Secondary pneumonia is caused by a different virus or bacterium than the original infection.) Young infants are at highest risk for whooping cough and also for pertussis-associated complications, including secondary pneumonia. Data from 2001-2003 indicate that secondary pneumonia occurred among 4.9% of all reported pertussis cases.

Pertussis can cause serious illness and even death in young children; 13 children died from the infection in 2003. From 2004-2005, 66 deaths due to whooping cough were reported to the CDC, and 56 of these were children under 3 months of age. Most of the pertussis-related deaths have occurred in children who have not been vaccinated or who are too young to have received the vaccine.
Other possible complications of pertussis include seizures, encephalopathy (abnormal function of the brain due to decreased oxygen delivery to the brain), reactive airway disease (asthma), dehydration, and malnutrition.

Honey as an Aphrodisiac

The word aphrodisiac comes from the name of the Greek Goddess of sexual love and beauty, Aphrodite. Honey is also known as the nectar of Aphrodite. The nectar of Aphrodite, honey is one of the most seductive foods in the world. Sticky, runny, viscous, butter-texture, deliciously sweet, honey it is as much a sensual experience as it is a delicious indulgence. The kama Sutra, the perfumed Garden (ancient Arabic equivalent of Kama Sutra) and even the Bible mention honey as a symbol of love, sex and sensuality. No wonder we call the object of our affection 'Honey'! Avicenna, the great Arab physician (11th century) prescribed honey mixed with ginger and a little pepper to stimulate those love hormones! In ancient Persian Kingdoms, honey acted as a natural aphrodisiac that enhanced sexual performance indicators like virility and vitality. Honey has plenty of easily digestible sugar that can provide unlimited amount of energy.

Honey is a sweet fluid produced by honey bees and derived from the nectar of flowers. According to the United States National Honey Board and various international food regulations, "honey stipulates a pure product that does not allow for the addition of any other substance…this includes, but is not limited to, water or other sweeteners". This article refers exclusively to the honey produced by honey bees (the genus Apis); honey produced by other bees or other insects has very different properties.

Honey gets its sweetness from the monosaccharides fructose and glucose and has approximately the same relative sweetness as granulated sugar (97% of the sweetness of sucrose, a disaccharide). Honey has attractive chemical properties for baking, and a distinctive flavor which leads some people to prefer it over sugar and other sweeteners.

Mushroom, as aphrodisiac

Mushrooms are not plants! Recently it has been discovered that they are more closely related to animals. But at one time, Fungi, including mushrooms, were believed to be close relatives of plants so much of their nomenclature (names for parts of the mushroom) are close to the names used for plant parts. It is the fruit (like an apple) of the mushroom "body" and contain mushroom "seeds" called spores. The body of the mushroom in called mycelium and its individual parts are microscopic. Since the body of the mushroom is usually dispersed over a relatively large area it is rarely noticed. In nature some species of mushrooms may have a body that spreads over hundreds of square miles!

Mushrooms are fungi, and are usually placed in a Kingdom of there own apart from plants and animals. Mushrooms contain no chlorophyll and most are considered saprophytes. That is, they obtain their nutrition from metabolizing non living organic matter. This means they break down and "eat" dead plants, like your compost pile does.


The body of the mushroom stores nutrients and other essential compounds, and when enough material is stored and the conditions are right they start to fruit - produce mushrooms. It is a hidden kingdom. The part of the fungus that we see is only the “fruit” of the organism. The living body of the fungus is a mycelium made out of a web of tiny filaments called hyphae. The mycelium is usually hidden in the soil, in wood, or another food source. A mycelium may fill a single ant, or cover many acres. The branching hyphae can add over a half mile (1 km) of total length to the mycelium each day. These webs live unseen until they develop mushrooms, puffballs, truffles, brackets, cups, “birds nests,” “corals” or other fruiting bodies. If the mycelium produces microscopic fruiting bodies, people may never notice the fungus.

Most fungi build their cell walls out of chitin. This is the same material as the hard outer shells of insects and other arthropods. Plants do not make chitin.

Mushrooms are not plants! Recently it has been discovered that they are more closely related to animals. But at one time, Fungi, including mushrooms, were believed to be close relatives of plants so much of their nomenclature (names for parts of the mushroom) are close to the names used for plant parts. It is the fruit (like an apple) of the mushroom "body" and contain mushroom "seeds" called spores. The body of the mushroom in called mycelium and its individual parts are microscopic. Since the body of the mushroom is usually dispersed over a relatively large area it is rarely noticed. In nature some species of mushrooms may have a body that spreads over hundreds of square miles!

Mushrooms are fungi, and are usually placed in a Kingdom of there own apart from plants and animals. Mushrooms contain no chlorophyll and most are considered saprophytes. That is, they obtain their nutrition from metabolizing non living organic matter. This means they break down and "eat" dead plants, like your compost pile does.


The body of the mushroom stores nutrients and other essential compounds, and when enough material is stored and the conditions are right they start to fruit - produce mushrooms. It is a hidden kingdom. The part of the fungus that we see is only the “fruit” of the organism. The living body of the fungus is a mycelium made out of a web of tiny filaments called hyphae. The mycelium is usually hidden in the soil, in wood, or another food source. A mycelium may fill a single ant, or cover many acres. The branching hyphae can add over a half mile (1 km) of total length to the mycelium each day. These webs live unseen until they develop mushrooms, puffballs, truffles, brackets, cups, “birds nests,” “corals” or other fruiting bodies. If the mycelium produces microscopic fruiting bodies, people may never notice the fungus.

Most fungi build their cell walls out of chitin. This is the same material as the hard outer shells of insects and other arthropods. Plants do not make chitin.

Mushrooms are not plants! Recently it has been discovered that they are more closely related to animals. But at one time, Fungi, including mushrooms, were believed to be close relatives of plants so much of their nomenclature (names for parts of the mushroom) are close to the names used for plant parts. It is the fruit (like an apple) of the mushroom "body" and contain mushroom "seeds" called spores. The body of the mushroom in called mycelium and its individual parts are microscopic. Since the body of the mushroom is usually dispersed over a relatively large area it is rarely noticed. In nature some species of mushrooms may have a body that spreads over hundreds of square miles!

Mushrooms are fungi, and are usually placed in a Kingdom of there own apart from plants and animals. Mushrooms contain no chlorophyll and most are considered saprophytes. That is, they obtain their nutrition from metabolizing non living organic matter. This means they break down and "eat" dead plants, like your compost pile does.


The body of the mushroom stores nutrients and other essential compounds, and when enough material is stored and the conditions are right they start to fruit - produce mushrooms. It is a hidden kingdom. The part of the fungus that we see is only the “fruit” of the organism. The living body of the fungus is a mycelium made out of a web of tiny filaments called hyphae. The mycelium is usually hidden in the soil, in wood, or another food source. A mycelium may fill a single ant, or cover many acres. The branching hyphae can add over a half mile (1 km) of total length to the mycelium each day. These webs live unseen until they develop mushrooms, puffballs, truffles, brackets, cups, “birds nests,” “corals” or other fruiting bodies. If the mycelium produces microscopic fruiting bodies, people may never notice the fungus.

Most fungi build their cell walls out of chitin. This is the same material as the hard outer shells of insects and other arthropods. Plants do not make chitin.

Mushrooms are nutritious: They are a good source of B vitamins, especially niacin and riboflavin, and rank the highest among vegetables for protein content. But because they are low in fat and calories, Western nutritionists mistakenly considered them of no food value (a fresh pound has only about 125 calories). Yet in dried form, mushrooms have almost as much protein as veal and a significant amount of complex carbohydrates called polysaccharides. Shiitake mushrooms are among the most delicious & very nutritious.

Some believe that mushrooms create a strong aphrodisiac effect. When you have a nice supply of raw mushrooms, you should include them in a meal when cooking. Sometimes, they can also be served raw on top of salads, where stimulation and arousal is sure to follow.

7 Secrets of Highly Orgasmic Women

You and your man are in the throes of passion: He's calling out your name, quickening his thrusts, breathing fast and loud. You know he's ready, but he knows you're not. He tries harder, but his impatience just distracts you from your lustful pursuit -- and another pleasure peak bites the dust.



"The story of my sex life," says Julia,* a graphic artist in Portland, ME. That is, before it underwent a revolution after her close girlfriend -- who could have seismic orgasms from a whisper in the ear -- spilled her sexual secrets. "I couldn't believe what I was hearing," recounts Julia. "But after putting her tips into action, I started climaxing just from fantasizing about my guy."



Inspired, we set out to find a group of these very practiced peakers -- women who can orgasm at the drop of his dime -- and ferret out their secrets of quick-and-easy coming. Here, their moan-and-groan mantras.

*Some names have been changed.

1. Always Expect an Earth-Moving Orgasm
Orgasmatronic women don't subscribe to the sit-back-and-cross-your-fingers formula for achieving sexual nirvana. Instead, they're confident they'll have to be removed from the rafters every time they go for a roll in the hay.



"Hell, yes, I'm going to climax when I have sex," asserts Michelle, a Website designer in San Francisco. "Why shouldn't I? For me it's not a matter of whether I'll have an orgasm, it's a matter of how. Otherwise, it's a little like ordering filet mignon in a restaurant and thinking, well, if I actually get the steak, that's great. But if all that arrives is a salad, well, better luck next time. So if something's just not working for me sexually, I actively take another approach -- and if necessary, another -- until I find my own passion solution."



After all, men just assume they're going to climax, so why can't we? "I call it the gender orgasm gap," explains Barbara Keesling, Ph.D., sex therapist and author of Super Sexual Orgasm (HarperCollins, 1997). "Men get physical knowing they'll get off -- and that faith makes it happen. It's a self-fulfilling prophecy. If women would adopt the same never-settle-for-anything-less expectations as men, I swear they'd be having a lot more climaxes."


2. Clear Your Mental Plate
To have blockbuster climaxes routinely, it's crucial to enlist your most powerful sex organ: your mind. "Our brains are wired such that we see the world much more holistically than men do," says Gina Ogden, Ph.D., a sex therapist and author of Women Who Love Sex (Pocket, 1995). "Any small distraction registers on our psychological screens -- which is good for some things but can wreak havoc on our sex lives." The orgasm-savvy solution: Clear your slate of nagging worries so you can minimize distractions and focus strictly on pleasure.



Micah, a writer in Baltimore, agrees that clearing her mind of little niggling concerns is key to being highly climactic. "First, I double-check that I'm doubly protected so I'm not distracted by fears of becoming pregnant. Then, when I'm having sex, I visualize (very explicitly) exactly what's going on -- my boyfriend touching my breast, my leg wrapped around his, the sweat beading down his back. If I let the here-and-now sexual act take the spotlight, reaping mind-reeling results is really quite easy."


3. Play Out All Passionate Possibilities
Imagine trying to do the salsa without swinging your hips, or attempting to daintily eat a cheeseburger deluxe (tomato, lettuce, pickles, onions, oozing mayo and mustard) with a knife and fork. Impossible, right? And frankly, kind of fun-sapping. Well, that's what going for orgasm gold is like if you don't let loose a little.



"Getting over sexual taboos has drastically changed my sex life," marvels Margaret, a painter from New Orleans. "I used to be freaked out by the idea of watching porn. I attached some sort of 'dirty' stigma to it. But then my boyfriend convinced me to give it a try just once, and you know what? Bingo! Not only did I have amazing orgasms, but I realized that I was still a good person, that watching porn didn't turn me into a sleazebag. Now I try it all -- you never know what'll rock your sexual world."



"I'll try anything once," agrees Brenda, a broker in New York City. "If it doesn't do it for me sexually, I don't try it again. End of story. But if it does, I've just opened the door to many more orgasmic possibilities. To take the pressure off, my boyfriend and I have a deal. If what looked like a brilliant sex stunt when Mickey Rourke did it turns into something more suitable for America's Funniest Home Videos when we do it, we vowed never to laugh at each other -- with each other is fine but never at each other."


4. Get Monogamous
Think the same ol' is bound to be boring? Sexually successful women insist you can reap enormous erotic payoffs by sticking with one main man.



"Ever since my boyfriend and I started living together, I'm having orgasms 90 percent of the time, compared to my casual dating average of about 50 percent," says a very satisfied Megan, a interior designer on Long Island. "Our supersex secret? Through experience, we now totally know each others' major moan zones and are relaxed enough to continue to discover brand-new ones."



The monogamy advantage also gave Diana's sex life a definite turn for the better. "It used to take me forever to come," concedes the Los Angeles music producer. "That is, until my then-boyfriend of three years noticed that my vulva is tilted toward the right. He mastered my quirky curve and succeeds in making me come fast and furiously every time."


5. Stick with What Works
You know the old saying you never forget how to ride a bike? That's because although your brain might forget, your muscles retain a physical memory. And riding your own pleasure peaks is no different. "What you feel as orgasm is the rhythmic contraction of several pelvic muscles," explains Keesling. "So if a certain position has rocketed your arousal level and triggered a sensational orgasm once, just getting back into that same position can set your body up for another over-the-top O."



"For the longest time I could only have an orgasm through oral or manual stimulation -- never intercourse," says Shelly, a film editor in New York City. "I had basically resigned myself to that fact. Then, while my boyfriend and I were having sex one afternoon on our living-room couch, we accidentally rolled off and landed with me sitting very upright -- at a 90 degree angle -- on top of him. Riding him that way, I went wild. Now, we have a groove down. If I'm having trouble tooting my horn, we just maneuver ourselves into that position and it works every time -- it's truly a guaranteed comer."


6. Take Whatever Comes
Highly climactic women are equal-opportunity orgasm fans.



"Discriminating against a certain kind of orgasm is like discriminating against money," insists Gwen, a singer in Columbia, SC, and a superorgasm success story. "I mean, a million dollars is a million dollars whether it's in check form, gold bars or cold, hard cash. Who cares which way it comes, just so long as it comes."



And who says you even have to have sex to sing hallelujah? Not Megan. "I've discovered that I get a little extra pleasure perk every time I do pushups. In fact, believe it or not, I've actually had full-on, cigarette-worthy orgasms doing floor work in funk class. Maybe it's because I'm all sweaty and worked up and my endorphins are going or because I'm clenching my muscles a certain way. Who knows? Who cares? Needless to say, my upper body definition has become quite impressive."


7. Have Fun
Here's a secret: Sex doesn't cure cancer. It also doesn't ensure world peace or bring down superpowers (er, scrap that one). The point is, getting it right every time isn't that important. "It's like what my mother used to say about streetcars,' says Keesling. "If you miss one, there's another right around the corner."



"Sex is supposed to be fun," insists Greta, an extremely adroit orgasmer from Texas. "Getting all worked up and stressed-out about it is like panicking over eating chocolate fudge cake. If I start to break a sweat about whether or not I'll break sexual records, I just throw up my hands and say, Oh, what the hell. Going with the flow is usually all it takes to make you peak so high they have to peel you off the ceiling."


Foreplay Your Way
Women reveal make-me-moan moves that take them from serious action to seismic satisfaction.



"Foot massages, toe sucking, putting his fingers (or tongue) in the spaces between my toes -- any and all attention to my tootsies has a very potent sexual effect. By the time he heads north, I'm working on orgasm number two."
--Shira, gemologist



"As cliché as it sounds, I love being spanked. Not superhard, but forceful enough to feel that tingle on my bottom. Then, I really show him what a bad girl I can be."
--Liz Sillian, 22, waitress



"My boyfriend knows all he has to do is nosh on my neck -- not gentle kisses but devouring, sucking and biting. I instantly feel like a teenager in the backseat of a Chevy."
--Deanne, Website designer



"It totally turns me on to be sexually dominated, so I love it when my husband handles me more roughly than usual -- pushes me up against the wall, hikes up my skirt. It makes me feel like every nerve ending in my body is ready to explode."
--Marly, literary agent



"Teasing at every stage of the sexual session makes me crazy -- from playing with my tongue while we're kissing to taking his time entering me, doing it bit by bit and so painstakingly slow that I'm begging him to go all the way."
--Kim Brown, city planner

The Magic of the G Spot

Location Of G-spot

The Grafenberg-Spot (Dr. Grafenberg), or better known as the G-spot lies directly behind the pubic bone within the front wall of the vagina. It is usually located about half way between the back of the pubic bone and the front of the cervix, along the course of the urethra and near the neck of the bladder, where it connects with the urethra. The size and exact location vary. Imagine a small clock inside the vagina with 12 o'clock pointed towards the navel. The majority of women will have the G-spot located between 11 and 1 o'clock a few inches inside the vagina.
Unlike the clitoris, which protrudes from the surrounding tissue, it lies deep within the vaginal wall, and a firm pressure is often needed to contact the G spot in its unstimulated state. Usually it is a lima- bean sized, spongy area which responds to stimulation by hardening and swelling as blood rushes to it.

Techniques For Stimulating G-Spot

Lie back with your knees pressed up to your chest. In this position, your vaginal depth will shorten and even small fingers should be able to reach the G-spot. With a partner, lie on your side with one leg drawn up to your chest as your partner enters you from the rear. He should be able to hit the spot.
The G-spot responds to pressure rather than to touch. Gently stroking is not likely to get any results. It's more like massaging a pea under a mattress - one has to compress the flesh to find it.
Insert fingers and bend them gently up, around and behind the pubic bone. Beyond the rather rough-surfaced tissue immediately behind her pubic bone, your fingertips will encounter a very soft, smooth area. Go very slowly and let her tell you what she feels as you explore the smooth area, which will feel to you like the inside of a very slippery mitten. When you straighten your fingers and reach further inside, you'll encounter a hard, rubbery structure that feels like an erect nipple pointing south. This is her cervix. The G-spot is somewhere just his side of the cervix, about an inch beyond the mitten, in the flesh immediately in front of the vagina.
Imagine you're holding a tennis ball on those two of three inserted fingers. An area about the size of a grape in the center of the tennis ball is what you're trying to reach. It can be anywhere along that two-or-three inch long area between the pubic bone and the cervix. Explore slowly, allowing for feedback front he woman - let her guide your fingers with her words if she can feel the stimulation. The G-spot responds to pressure rather than to touch. Gentle stroking is not likely to find it. It's more like massaging a pea under a mattress - one has to compress the flesh to find it.

When you reach in from the front with the woman on her back, the heel of your hand is over her clitoris while your fingers hook around her pubic bone. Pull upwards, as if you're trying to lift her off the bed. Do this with the same sort of rhythm you'd use f**king, and keep your fingers hooked, so they press deep into the tissue. Once you know where it is you can try using your penis on it, but for good G-spot orgasm, she may prefer your hand. In face-to-face intercourse, the penis may not stimulate the spot enough to do any good, although some positions, such as the one where the women draws her knees close to her chest, may increase the changes for a G-spot orgasm.

Liquid Assets

Although the fluid that gets released amid a G-spot orgasm is released from the urethra and is watery in texture, doctors reveal that it is not urine at all. In fact, the fluid is released from the Skene's glands, which surround the urethra and resemble the male prostate.
Of course, women who have weak PC (pubococcygeus) muscles may end up urinating all over their partner. So make sure you do your Kegel exercises daily.
Nevertheless, when a woman reaches ejaculatory heights of pleasure, she can release anywhere from a few drops to a few tablespoons of fluid all over the place. The taste he may ask? Well it depends on the time of the month. It can range anywhere from sweet to bitter.

Libido

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The word ‘libido’ is often used inappropriately to refer just to sexual arousal but sexual libido is a complex aspect of human sexual function. Sexual libido concerns our thoughts about sex, sexual fantasies, interest, and actually seeking sexual activity, everything that contributes to sexual desire or the drive to participate in sexual activity.

Consequently if a man complains that he is having problems with his libido it is important to clarify exactly what he means by this. The following review of the panel discussion will help separate out the many factors affecting today’s male libido and if you are one of the men affected by low sexual drive, this may actually provide possible areas of investigation:

1. So may men harbour fear and shame based attitudes towards sex

We are probably the only human culture where sexual passage, perhaps the single most important adult initiation, is ignored, avoided, or distorted. Many of us were left to piece together from peers and the mass media an understanding and acceptance of the power of our own sexuality. Because we have few meaningful, ceremonial means of discovering who we are as sexual beings we find ourselves wondering why the core hunger inside us - the emptiness we have been told we can fill with more techniques, more sex and other “external” pursuits - remains unsatisfied.

2. More and more men are terrified of women

They are afraid they will fail to prove their manhood or lose their symbolic status as “a man” if they are found as sexually undesirable or inadequate. Their fears are usually personal and often based on bad experiences that have nothing to do with the next woman.

3. The pressure to look good is no longer just limited to women alone

Poor body image is becoming a male problem too, with around half of all men falling prey to anxiety and embarrassment when attention is called to male physiques. Men are facing the same increased pressure as women to meet the standard of the muscular defined body that is promoted in film and T.V and magazines. Now if a man wants to attract a women with a great body, then he must have to have one too.

4. More and more men would rather view porn than have actual sexual intimacy with a real alive and breathing woman

Small wonder, if men are terrified of an actual presence of a naked, willing woman, it seems only logical that they would rather stay home and jerk off to porn. But the real question is: is porn responsible for deadening male libido in relation to real women? There are a lot of arguments on both sides of the table and the jury is not out yet out on this one.

5. As a man grows older or undergoes various kinds of stress he does not think of sex as often and therefore it is much more difficult to turn him on.

Though psychological aspect greatly influences male sex drive, male sexual desire, needs and abilities much depend on age and stress factors. It has been found out that testosterone level in men decreases by 1-2% per year. With an aging populating we have very limited testosterone in circulation. It is however important to not that testosterone levels vary between men of the same age depending on many features, such as mode of living including stress levels, general sexual attitudes, state of health, climate, genetic peculiarities etc.

6. Distorted emphasis on the “sacredness” of sex ushered in by New Age teachings is creating more “enlightened” hypocrites

The problem lies in the fact that these “new teachings’ so efficiently disguise people’s true thoughts, feelings and desires under a conventional form and language that ends up suppressing people’s ability to really express their sexual thoughts, feelings and desires exactly the way they are without censoring them to fit a certain philosophy or technique or whatever.

7. Too many men are zonked out on some kind of substance or taking some kind of prescription

It is estimated that one in every two males in North America consumes some sort of substance or drug that decreases the body’s ability to produce testosterone (male hormone). This includes everything from alcohol to Marijuana, from cocaine to heavy cigarette smoking, from antidepressants to tranquilizers.

8. Sexual encounters and intimate moments are ever meaningless

The usual approach is a hurried, forced event, in which woman’s orgasm is relatively rare and man’s ejaculation is prematurely speeded up by jerking back and forth movements - a mere three to seven minutes of sexual activity and “Oh man! That was really great!” The permanent obsession to reach ejaculatory orgasm completely screws up the ability to respond spontaneously to the moment. The result is bad sexual experiences, and bad sexual experiences makes men insecure with women.

9. Too many unstable attachments and bad relationships

Few men report having had (or are in) a relationship in which both partners know what they want and what they like, and are not ashamed of trying new positions and other sex experiments in bed, because they know each other for quite a long time. Shallow attachments and frequent change of guards just makes men more insecure and unsure about their sexual abilities.

Although a thorough appreciation of your individual life circumstances will benefit the understanding of what is affecting your male libido, it is important that the interactive effect of physical, psychosocial and spiritual factors all be taken into consideration

And remember: the sooner you do it the sooner you will be able to enjoy sex life and life in general again.


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SEX STAMINA/ENDURANCE

Do you ever sweat it out when you have some wild romp in bed? If you’ve never tried this, then you haven’t been really… there.Sweating out is one indication of a healthy system, a good yardstick of optimum health. And since sex is considerably and mightily a physical activity, then if you are unhealthy, then you must be unsexy. That is why it is soimportant to maintain your sex stamina or endurance because this can take you to great places while you are reving on your carnal instincts.But in order to prepare you body to be that ultimate sex machine, there are a few things to consider. First and foremost, health is not just about sweating it out, of course, whether in bed or out. Let me tell you, do not court a sloppy diet, especially one that has poor nutrition. Remember what mom used to say - you are what you eat, and others are always right, what you have in the dining table will eventually shoe on how healthy you are and how good you are in bed, aphrodisiacs included (but that’s another topic). An example of things to avoid is high fat meals which not only makes you obese but also suppresses your drive as well as your endurance because of the lack of testosterone. A lack of this hormone will only lead to depress your libido and make your erection and ejaculation definitely much harder to achieve. Also, other things to consider are environmental factors such as environmental estrogens which can enter your body through pesticides and other hormonally enhanced vegetables and dairy foods. I suggest you have a natural diet - organic meats as well as dairy products. Try to be more selective also with your vegetables and fruits for these practices can reduce the usual load of environmental estrogens that you heap on our system unconsciously and eventually will take a toll on your sex life.But of course, it’s not just the food that we take in but also what we let our body take which make s a whole world of difference to our sexual stamina. When it comes to lacking the endurance for an overnight romp, then hand stress the award for being king of the game. When stress hits us all of your central nervous system responses are thoroughly impaired which could only mean that our brain and endocrine glands are tested way beyond their line of duty. Unfortunately, these are the very same glands which are involved during the Stages I and II of a man's progressive sexual process. Tsk, tsk, tsk, too bad, there goes one orgasmic night because work was too stressful. How unfair can life be? What’s even worse is that the situation gets more hopeless when its long-term stress that has went on unchecked. This can really severely interfere with your ability to achieve full sexual arousal because prolonged stresses create lower energy levels and sex drives. Apart from that, this also affect your sperm production and motility, so now were talking about impotence, which is definitely much scarier. To combat these horrors, you can go green. Lower your stress levels with the help of herbs as well as vegetables. You also need to regularly exercise as it is critically important for your sexuality. And of course, in order for your physical activity to not seem as tasking as it seemingly is, go find an activity that you genuinely you enjoy, such as sex for instance (big grin here).On the other hand, there are some things that, yes you enjoy, but you must seriously reconsider. Smoking tops the list as it interferes with your body's zinc supply, critical to sex. Don’t just smoke away your sexual frenzy. Imagine how just two cigarettes a day can constrict your blood vessels and eventually impair your blood circulation. How is this related to sex, you ask? Think of your penis in its full erection glory. Now, since we all know that an erection is a penis engorged with blood, then smoking affects your ability to achieve an erection. Also, if you’re into chewing tobacco, don’t think you’re excused as well because this deadly habit can stop you from getting the erections that you are REALLY capable of.Another thing that is definitely not for you is fat. Somehow, sexual stamina and fat just don’t go together. Other than the fact that a wad of fat jiggling here and there is a complete turn-off - now c’mon, who would want to get to bed with a man who can break the bed with his weight – it also shortens your penis. You don’t believe me? Well, face the fact that fat is deposited into a man's pubic region and can actually decrease the available length of his penis. Scientifically speaking, most of the penis length lies on where it is rooted and with the penis, it is within the abdominal fat that only leaves a small stub of that teeny weeny instrument for protruding. Actually , if you’ll lose 35 pounds of that extra weight, you can actually an extra inch for your penis, so get burning now. Other than pure aesthetic reasons, and your ability to perform, excess fat can also block your arteries which only ruins your ability for an enduring sex life and a full erection. Therefore, work now to lose that excess fat, burn them out so that you’ll have a burning sex life!

Safe sex

Health risks associated with sexIn this first decade of the 21st century the various risks connected with having sex have (alas) increased. The figures for HIV, chlamydia and gonorrhoea are all going up. This is almost entirely because so many people – whether they're heterosexuals or homosexuals or 'bi' -- don't practise safe sex.Britain is a pretty promiscuous place. A survey published by Bradley University in late 2008 showed that the UK is the ‘one-night stand’ capital of western industrialised nations. In Europe, the order was:
UK
Germany
Holland
Czech Republic.Statistics show that men and women are taking more and more sexual partners. Crazy practices like going to orgies, joining sex clubs and indulging in ‘dogging’ (multiple sex in car parks) are quite widespread. In the male gay world, ‘cottages’ and multi-partner saunas continue to be fairly popular.And in many of these situations, people don’t use a condoms!As for teenagers, unfortunately they are now losing their virginity very young – and frequently at an age where they don’t have any idea about how to protect themselves against the unwanted consequences of sex. So inevitably, there are times when teenage love-making, instead of being beautiful and fulfilling, leads to disaster. Understandably, in all age groups a lot of men and women think that ‘it won’t happen to me'. But in the year 2009, there is so much sex infection around that you really do need to be very careful. Unless you are totally faithful to one partner – and he or she is totally faithful to you – you are at some risk. What are the risks of unsafe sex?The chief ones are:
unwanted pregnancy.
venereal diseases (such as gonorrhoea and, much less commonly, syphilis).
other sexually transmitted infections (such as herpes, pubic lice, and viral warts and especially the 21st century‘s major risk - chlamydia).
HIV - the virus which can cause AIDS.
cancer of the cervix.
female infertility – due to pelvic infection caused by sex with an infected guy.It’s almost inevitable that other sexual infections will arise during this century – especially if the human race keeps going in for unsafe sex! Germs have a nasty way of exploiting people’s behaviour, which is why – soon after the swinging 60s and 70s – herpes and HIV suddenly emerged.Back in the 20th century, many people, both straight and gay, enjoyed sex with a variety of partners assuming that there was very little danger. Unfortunately, this is no longer the case – since disease rates have increased so much. Today, it’s only common sense to practise safe sex. What is safe sex? You could say that the only totally safe form of sex is masturbation. Technically, all sexual activity with a partner carries some risk, though the danger of infections is practically non-existent if the two people are completely faithful to each other. ‘Petting’ with the hands is a relatively safe form of sex, and is certainly much less risky than intercourse. So if you’re a teenager and you can keep to hand-petting (rather than ‘going all the way’), you will definitely be safer. What about ‘petting’ with the mouth? This is a bit more risky, since it can pass on infections like gonorrhoea and herpes (and very rarely syphilis). But at least it can’t get you pregnant! It is now known that oral sex can pass on HIV, though a UK Government committee has assessed the risk as relatively low – and therefore not as great as that associated with vaginal or rectal intercourse.
CondomsIf you are going to have sexual intercourse with someone who is not a regular, faithful partner, you should always use a condom. This can be either a male condom or (much less commonly) a female one. The condom should be worn throughout the entire act of intercourse – putting it on when you are halfway through is simply asking for trouble. Other 'barrier methods' of contraception, such as the diaphragm or cap, do offer some but very little, protection against the transmission of infection. Another form of barrier is a ‘dental dam,’ which quite a few people now use when giving or receiving cunnilingus – that is, oral sex given to a woman by her partner (male or female). It certainly provides at least some protection against germs.
Alcohol and other drugsOne of the greatest risks to your health is having sex when you've drunk too much alcohol. Many people who would normally practise safe sex do become pregnant, or else catch HIV or venereal diseases, through having unprotected sex while drunk. Some other recreational drugs do also ‘lower your resistance’ – and so make you more likely to run into trouble sexually.Women should be especially aware of the recent rise in ‘drink-spiking’ – the practice in which a man slips a drug into your glass with the intention of making you so woozy that you won’t be able to resist sex.But overall, alcohol is probably the UK’s most important cause of unsafe sex. If you are on a boozy night out, and you’re in doubt as to whether it would be safe to have sex with someone - don't! Four final sex tips to remember
Avoid casual sex.
If you don't want to have a baby, use contraception.
If you do have sex with someone who is not your regular, faithful partner – use a condom throughout.
Remember that alcohol can make us forget all we know about practising safer sex.